I'd like to start today with some logic exercises. Working in the business world is hard. Dating is hard. Finding a date is harder. Therefore, it logically follows that being in the business of helping people find dates would be hell on earth, right? The Economist ran an article ("The Modern Matchmakers") about internet dating and it kind of blue my mind. So now that we're released from the clutches of meddling mothers and (if you're Asian) meddling friends, family friends, cousins, aunts, uncles, god-parents, neighbours down the street and the occasional childhood friend from 20 years ago that just so happens to show up to the yearly holiday party (this is not me being racist at all but rather me just being accurate-- all of the above listed folks have at one point tried to give me an "introduction to a really nice boy... who has a great personality/ job/ face/ family/ intellect/ sense of humor".)
The multi-billion dollar online dating industry claim that they have an upper hand on all of my relatives/friends because they pair me up by my preferences-- preferences that I actually get input into, because I'm the one that checks those radial buttons on the site. Now this might be more effective than say, having my aunt who hasn't seen me since I was 10 suggesting a "nice boy" that I have "so much in common with" (He prefers the yellow dump truck too? His favourite color is also red? His favourite thing in the world is also pizza and cookies 'n' cream ice cream? Okay, to be fair that last sentence is more truth than it is lie. You caught me.) that happens to live in Hong Kong. (Preference: Must live within 20 miles of my zipcode.)
But is this really all that important? A survey of 20,000 people showed a strong correlation between couples with similar personalities and happiness, more so than those who had "dissimilar" personalities (criteria for judgement of this was not explained, so of course I have questions about the defined criteria). However, the difference was not huge--it was 0.5%.
Well what about the choices? I mean, anyone who has "been dared" (a.k.a. drank some wine with friends and then started a profile amidst of torrent of giggles...and they say that "sleepovers" stop after a certain age. They're wrong. They just involve more booze and the internet. The giggling, squealing and maturity level are pretty much the same. Sometimes they end by friends going home to their husbands though. So, one slight difference.) to open up an online profile has seen that, within days, you are usually avalanched by a million "pokes", "winks" or whatever vague physical gesture they choose to use. But ah-ha! Science wins again.
In study after study, science has proven that people actually prefer to have a smaller sample to choose from when making "consumer choices". Call it predictable irrationality (shout out Dan Ariely!). People are overwhelmed if they have dozens of choices, and they are more likely to walk away without "purchasing" anything. (I'm putting some of these terms in quotes because I don't want anyone to think that I'm encouraging sexual trafficking.)
So in conclusion, internet dating, like the cosmetics industry, is a multi-billion dollar industry that may not give people as large of an edge as people think. Shocker. I will make an argument for convenience though. I've never actually seriously used online dating sites, but I did like being able to, from home in my pajamas, decide who I'd like to go on a date with that weekend. It was like an Amazon.com for people (Ugh. I hate myself right now...also, any worries I had about sounding like I'm condoning sexual trafficking...very real.). I guess I'll just stick with meeting people IRL (in real life for those of you who weren't dungeon masters or addicted to WoW) and determine their a/s/l F2F. Especially as models continue to get smarter (Seriously? A history of art major from Cambridge modelling for Chanel? And they can get paid $75K- $1.5M per shoot? Can I just quit the sexual competition now?), I probably need to outrun these models to get to the available bachelors first if I want a fighting chance.
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