Booth Takes #1 Again...Or #2... Not Sure

It's weird times at school right now. More awkward than when Kendrick Lamar claimed to the be the king of New York (Jay-Z is just sitting court side I'm sure, laughing). More awkward than when you run into your ex and maybe you are friends or not friends and you're not sure what to do and you want to act cool but you're actually so distracted by everything else in your life that you're definitely NOT acting cool, but whatever. It's awkward. Awkward like when you need to sign your offer letter and you're getting to the point of, short of using the excuse "lady problems", you're running out of reasons why you have commitment problems and can't bring yourself to sign.

Why, you ask? Well, beyond the fact that half the student population is made up of second years who suddenly care a lot less about class but are now taking more advanced level classes...and beyond the fact that a quarter of the aforementioned population is also freaking out because they're not sure what they're going to do after they graduate (no job offer) and another quarter has offers and are pissing everyone off flaunting them and the other half are "re-recruiting". (NOTE: "Re-recruiting" has many definitions in business school, ranging from "I didn't like my job so I'm going to drop my resume to everyone who will take it in hopes that I can find something else" to "I'm not going to sign so I can look at other opportunities, and by "look at other opportunities" I mean, "drink my face off, stop going to class and sleep with everything in sight"".)

Forbes put us at #2 this year (based on ROI on how much we make vs. how much we spent to go to school), and The Economist put us at #1....based on pretty much the same metric. I don't wanna be "that guy", but I do want to say that someone's math must be wrong if we can't agree on this (there's also a lot of disparity within the top 5 between these two sources). The bigger question for me is, why do we care? Well, contrary to the belief of a lot of my non-bschool friends, who believe that this is all one giant pissing contest (which it is, to an extent), I'm (as in, me, personally) very invested in our rankings because it often determines how my friends and me will find jobs. Some companies place parameters on recruiting, saying things like, "we recruit the majority from the top X schools" or "we ONLY recruit at the top 10 schools". Which is, harsh, but as a company you really have to draw a line in the sand somewhere. We'd all like to believe that you can start anywhere and go anywhere, but there are real limits that are set-- be in the top 25, 20, 10, 5 to get yourself a leg up. These numerical allocations probably ultimately just cloud our judgements, but they happen every day.

Ultimately, these rankings are about as useful as a Starbucks in Salt Lake City (mormon joke!)/ a Black Angus in India (vegetarian joke!)/ soap on Haight Street (hippie joke!) or pepper spray in Canada (Canadians are so nice they make the rest of us look bad). All prospectives should really look at the programs and make a decision for themselves. I'm just scared of what these rankings are going to do for already-inflated egos.

I Miss You

As I write this, many of my friends are gathered in a church downtown. A Gothic church, with cloudy skies and a heavy drizzle that seems intent on making everyone reconsider the varying shades of gray that Chicago can fade into. They're there to say good-bye to one of my friends. A friend of ours, who unexpectedly passed, has had a surprisingly large impact on even the toughest of us.

Because of confidentiality reasons, we have been urged not to discuss it, but the loss still lingers-- quietly, in the back of everyone's mind. Although I was not the closest person to him, I do remember when I first met him. He wore pretty much the same hoodie every day, and had a smile that seemed to cut across the pettiness and cliquey-ness that can so easily penetrate any group of friends. I struggled his name the first time around-- and I remember he explained his nickname to make me feel less silly, foolish, and less overall like a bumbling idiot. He was very, very smart. And I respected him a lot. I miss our impromptu chats.

I couldn't really bring myself to go to the memorial, honestly. The idea of seeing all of my friends who also knew him all gathered in one place for the same reason seemed like I was finally admitting that it was true. That maybe in some way I was betraying him by admitting the truth. So I'm sitting at home now, having a more private memorial. I like to think he would've appreciated this-- being a techie himself, I can't think of a way more poetic to say goodbye. Instead of burning wishes or scattering ashes or shooting a boat with a fiery arrow like the Vikings, I'm immortalizing his being in tiny little bytes-- things that are broken down into 0s and 1s-- send quietly sending them into the abyss. These little morsels are nothing in the flood that is created every millisecond, but he was great to me even though he was just one person-- so this is fitting.

It's easy to pretend that maybe he's just doing other things-- and that's why I won't be seeing him around as much anymore. To make excuses that he's still around but just not here, not where I am, right now. But that he'll be back. Maybe tomorrow. I'm not sure how long I will wonder when I'll see him again before, suddenly, that small part in the back of my brain will remind me that he's not here. After this, it makes me realize more than ever how much more I need to focus on the today. The here. The now. The people around me and the people I want to be around me.

I think in the past year, I've really tried to force relationships that are too one-sided and have given up on relationships that I should've given another try. Like the first day I met him, I'm reminded of how important it is to enjoy the random people that are presented to you in life. He always gave me perspective-- seemingly unflappable-- he was the steadiest guy I knew. When I first found out he was gone, I felt angry. This was not the type of thing that happens to young people. Dying was something that happened to old people. It violated the rules I had set up in my mind. But I need to cherish those that I care about. We need to treasure the time we have together.

I miss you. I'll probably think of you every time it rains.

Conversations with a Bus Driver

So I'm at the annual leadership retreat with all of my fellow Boothies and between directing around approximately 600 first years between the 40 of us and trying to make sure that a.) no one dies, b.) no one gets left behind, c.) everyone is having a fun time and d.) everyone is actually doing something and learning from all the activities that are planned--I didn't really plan on learning anything myself from a life perspective. I knew I was going to learn a lot from my other facils-- how we work together, and how we function well or don't function well in certain team dynamics, but I didn't think I was going to have any leadership-y type realizations during my time here-- mostly because I would probably be too tired or too anxious about my first years (strong indications of potential over-protective mom syndrome in the future, which really means that I should stay away from that sort of thing for everyone's sake) to be able to reflect deeply on my life.

Sometimes things happen unexpectedly though.

This morning we went on a ropes course-- my first years got to play on high ropes and challenge themselves and do some low ropes courses that were focused more on team skills I watched my first years learn about each other, gradually get more comfortable with one another and form tenuous, but genuine new friendships. I was reminded that, no matter how old I feel or how much I feel like I've lived through, things can begin again. Things will always begin anew. This was me just a year ago! But how easy it is to forget that things can change and grow-- in a year, I'd forgotten that these types of new things could happen. After being so enclosed in my own mind, watching my first years reminded me that the world is much bigger than what offer letter I get and what my title is after business school. School loans will always linger on my mind, but it doesn't have to consume me. There are other things to look forward to.

On the way home, I started talking to our bus driver. He told me about when he first moved to Chicago, the houses he had bought and sold over time and the way the city had been changing. He shared his concerns for the economy and his worries on how he would be able to retire one day with his wife, and it struck me that, even though me and the bus driver are light years apart in almost every respect-- our goals in life-- are the same.This was crazy to me because I've been trying to figure out what I wanted out of life for the better part of the last year. Business school does that to you-- creeps into your brain and asks a lot of uncomfortable, overarching, super-broad, inescapable life questions. Especially now that the internship is done and the first years and anxious to begin their process of recruiting, it becomes hard to separate what my career could be and what I want from life. Being someone who often confuses these things, it was important for me to gain that perspective again. Even if it was from the most surprising of places.

I Really Think I Missed My True Calling

If this whole b-school thing doesn't pan out.. Hallmark card writer.

College Costs Rise by 500% in US Since 1985

Can someone please explain this chart to me? As someone who just got hit hard with my most recent tuition bill, this seems kind of unfair.

Granted, I'm sure there's 18 different ways that this data has been tampered with and therefore this isn't as accurate as it should be because we decided to cut and filter the crap out of this data, but regardless, something needs to be done.

With unemployment levels not seen since the 1990s and the continuing rise of globalization, the world is a smarter, more efficient and more diverse place. This makes us more innovative, but it also inherently leads to more competitive positions to fill. Although people try to comfort me in saying that greater efficiency does not necessarily mean fewer jobs, it's a hard thing to believe when you're trying to pay off all of that student debt.

Things I Wish I Knew....

I had a good chat with my friend from bschool today and we both agreed there are a lot of things that we wish we knew when we were younger. Between this and me visiting my friends in southern California this weekend, I realized that there was a lot to this whole "growing up" business. It's more than just differences between your 20s and your 30s a la Huffington Post.. so here are some things that we chatted about:

1. The whole "you'll grow out of getting pimples" thing is a lie. A big fat lie. And when you're in high school, it sucks because it might show up when you're going to a dance or something, but when you're an adult, it'll always happen before you have a big presentation or meeting with your boss. Always.
2. There probably isn't such a thing as "The One", if nothing else from a probability perspective...BUT don't use this as an excuse to not care about the one you're with, because there IS definitely a "The One That You're Most Compatible With". So get your ish together.
3. Moving always sucks. You will always have more crap than you need. Get in the habit of getting rid of stuff periodically to try to trick yourself into thinking it'll be better next time, and then when it comes time to move again, hire a mover.
4. Trying on jeans, as a girl, is always a traumatic experience. It gets worse. Prepare yourself mentally, like you're going to war.
5. You're going to start losing people you care about now that you're getting older. You'd think that you'd get used to it after awhile, but losing people you care about always sucks-- it's not always a break up, it's death, moving, slowly drifting apart. This is life I suppose, but that doesn't make it suck less.
6. You find yourself wishing for high school house parties because it requires less effort. Sad but true. When you hit this stage, you also figure out who your really close friends are because you can hang out with them and debate the merits of Persian soap operas and have that be the highlight of your week

 Ahh. Life tips. From someone who has no idea what the hell she's doing. Enjoy!

Nokia's Next New Thing

So. It's finally happened. After back-to-back years of loss, Nokia has decided to let itself be acquired by Microsoft. According to the terms of the deal, Microsoft gets Nokia's phone business, Qualcomm and other key IP licenses. Microsoft licenses Nokia's patents for all Microsoft products as well as the ability to use Nokia HERE broadly in its products. Nokia retains NSN, HERE, its CTO office and its patent portfolio.

Reading Nokia's earnings reports is a sad, sad thing to do (more accessible presentation here). Losses each quarter, and being particularly hit hard in its mobile devices due to slimming margins means that there is little relief coming for this company. However, contrary to the market (Microsoft stock fell this morning upon opening while Nokia's soared), I've been big on Nokia. For nothing else, because it's clear that its patent portfolio could be its golden goose to get itself out of this mess. Nokia probably will not last for much longer as the Nokia that we know it as today, but between its geo-centric capabilities (HERE) and its highly innovative technologies focusing on its camera (Lumia 1020 supposedly has the best phone camera in the world), Nokia should get acquired by a bigger entity, and Microsoft is the perfect candidate.

From Microsoft's perspective, they've instantly bought their way into the location-based game, and now could potentially rival Google in the future with mapping and geo-centric data on its users. Additionally, with all of the hype coming around regarding the photographic qualities that a smart phone gives its users (augmented reality, personal digital assistants, entertainment, bar code scanning, geo-centric streaming data, object recognition for mobile shopping, mobile payments), don't be surprised if Microsoft parlays the excellent camera as something more utilitarian....perhaps even as a rival to Google Glass. Officially, in Microsoft's official M&A announcement/call/related presentation, they seem pretty tight lipped on their plans, however, the growth and popularity of their new windows phone bodes well for their new relationship. Microsoft did explicitly call out that they're looking at "a family of devices with integrated services" with a specific call-out to geospatial. Particularly if Microsoft can parlay it into their existing portfolio of Xbox (entertainment) and Skype (communication), this "geospatial" play could really work out well for both them and Nokia.